Andy Burnham, the man of the people, decides that the Crown planning permission mechanism for change of use can be rushed through in order to send 1250 asylum seekers, illegal immigrants, to Barnham on the Norfolk Suffolk border. Normal town planning legislation will not apply.
Isn't this just the wonderful sort of thing you wanted when you voted in every way to not get a Tory government, you would punish them, but little did you think about how you would be punishing yourself and everybody else.
Barnham is a village of 600 people or less. The new asylum camp will be in existence for 10 years we are told today. It will be guarded round the clock. The camp will house all males we are told.
The inhabitants of Barnham and Thetford which is the nearby town with supermarkets and amenities but no pathways because this is rural Norfolk/Suffolk will be demonstrating outside the camp again tonight. The Barnham camp was an RAF base in wartime and beyond.
My neighbour Sue's son lives in the village where he went for peace and quiet. I wonder what he thinks about the camp of men in flip flops and jihadist attire. I haven't seen her to hear the news. The village was nice she said.
The camp was used by Norfolk and Suffolk constabulary for training in the trees and lawns and old buildings with pretend aggravated situations acted out. They rented it on an annual basis until June when they approached the Ministry to make an offer to buy it. They were immediately told it was no longer available at all and they, the government, would have it themselves.
Perhaps until that point they didn't remember it existed. So now the police can have real live practice of dealing with unrest, unhappy people, and jihadist garment clad young men, where mobile phones are to be banned (dream on) and no alcohol. No bar maids to be murdered there then, well that's a relief. No doubt you will see Barnham on the news, possibly referred to as Theford up the road cos it's bigger than a little quiet rural parish in Suffolk.
How will medical facilities be provided in a part of rural England where doctors and dentists are in short supply and cannot serve the people as it is?
Plans to stop migrants Andy? No, I thought not, you have no plans to stop them whatsoever.
I bow to thee my country?